Not only did Britney Spears celebrate her 27th birthday on Tuesday, but she also enjoyed the release of her long-awaited new album, “Circus.” The pop star made an appearance on ABC’s “Good Morning America” and made a surprise announcement that left her fans both excited an anxious. She will hit the road as soon as March 3 in order to promote her fresh album. The world tour will feature opening acts by The Pussycat Dolls and choreography by Wade Robson.
“The Circus Starring Britney Spears 2009 Tour” is due to kick off with a gig in New Orleans and includes a March 11 concert at Nassau Coliseum in Uniondale, New York, while tickets will be made available on December 6 at 11 a.m.  The 27-city North American tour, which includes stops in Atlanta, Miami, Boston, Toronto, Los Angeles and Montreal, is scheduled to end with a Chicago gig on April 28 and will be followed by a couple of London performances on June 3 and June 4.
In spite of the fact that Britney Spears will start rehearsing for her first album in five years only in January, she delivered a small piece of her upcoming performances on Tuesday, by rocking the Big Apple Circus tent at Lincoln Center and talking about her plans during “Good Morning America.” Britney Spears sang a couple of tracks from her sixth studio album, including the chart-topping “Womanizer” and the title song, which separates entertainers from observers, thus highlighting the artist’s “put-on-a-show” nature.
The show, which saw great performances and moves by the once-upon-a-time troubled pop star, was attended by Britney Spears’ mom, Lynne, and her two sons, 2-year-old Jayden James and 3-year-old Sean Preston.  “Good Morning America” hit Britney Spears with some surprises as well, since it featured birthday greetings by well-known celebrities that left the singer amazed and content at the same time.

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Socially-influenced common knowledge often disguised as evolutionary theory holds that men are biologically inclined to have sex with as many women as possible to spread their seed, while women are biologically inclined to sink their claws into one man, push out kids for him to support and never, ever cheat. This theory on How The World Works ignores the rather convenient fact that, biologically, women have the same incentives to diversify the genetic contributions to their offspring as men do and it must be said like sex just as much if not more. So why is it that promiscuous women are supposedly such an anomaly? And are they? Mairi Macleod tries to answer those and man other questions in an epic article on sexuality in the latest New Scientist. After the jump, a rundown of her article's conclusions.

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Alan Murphy said:
We just have to give her the benefit of the doubt. I dont know about you but I have been looking for the Paris Hilton tape is going to lead to a flood of sex tapes of other celebrities trying to get herself a squeaky clean image ever since she left jail. A nice splash at the end, ahhh I'm so horny! She moans loudly with pleasure. He pops his cork all over her slutty Mexican face and chin, covering her with goop.

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LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - A year ago, Britney Spears was taking court-ordered drug and alcohol tests, had fired her managers, was losing custody of her kids, and some journalists were preparing her obituary.

This week, she was caring for her children like any mother would when she rushed 2-year-old Jayden James to a hospital after a bad reaction to something he ate. As for her career, only one week ago she was on stage performing with Madonna and on the brink of an extraordinary musical comeback.

Industry watchers wonder whether Spears, 26, can win back the young, fickle fans now accustomed to watching her fall apart, or if she can stage a comeback like pop diva Mariah Carey. She spent several years in a slump before rebounding to charttopper status with 2005 album "The Emancipation of Mimi."

"You can only have so many second chances and this is definitely one of those now or never moments," said Ellen Carpenter, a senior editor at Spin magazine.

Ten years after she burst onto the world stage as a perky 17-year-old and scored hit songs including "... Baby One More Time," Spears seems to have pulled her life and career out of the toilet with a hit single, a new album due out in December, a tell-all documentary and talk of her first tour since 2004.

Spears' first single "Womanizer," off her Dec 2. album "Circus," was a good omen. It leapt to the top of Billboard's Hot 100 singles chart in October and went to No.1 on iTunes charts in Canada, France, Spain and Sweden.

But in an era of falling record sales, the big money in the music industry is made through live shows. Spears, who has done only a handful of live performances since 2005, is expected to launch a world tour early next year.

"Nothing in this economic environment is a slam dunk," said Gary Bongiovanni, editor of concert magazine Pollstar.

"When an artist stays off the scene for a couple of years, it is impossible to tell how much that audience has gravitated elsewhere until you put tickets on sale," Bongiovanni said.

Spears made headlines for all the wrong reasons in 2007 and early 2008 -- shaving her head, partying without panties, two hospitalizations for psychiatric checks, losing custody of her sons and giving a laughable performance at an MTV Awards show.

As the sexy young pop star who sold more than 60 million records in her heyday gave way to an erratic, disheveled divorcee, her musical and personal obituary was being written.

"Last year, it didn't seem like she would ever come out of it. Her falling apart was bigger than anybody, even Michael Jackson. I don't know if anyone in pop music has fallen that low and come back," Carpenter said.

But since February, when Spears' father Jamie took over her business and personal affairs, the singer has reunited with the manager who made her a star, won three MTV Video Music Awards, recorded her sixth studio album and relaunched her Web site.

She will mark the release of "Circus" with a November 30 TV documentary about her darkest days and an appearance, on her 27th birthday, on U.S. TV chat show "Good Morning America."

Still, Bongiovanni said it may be hard for fans to separate Spears the pop star from Spears the pop problem. "Are they coming to see you because they think a train wreck is about to happen, or because they really like your music?" he said.

Source :http://ca.reuters.

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By Daito Hara about binaries pictures nude celebrities fake:
New photos of Jennifer Love Hewitt are smoking hot and have already made me drool on my keyboard and the floor. That cock in her mouth. Kailey was blindfolded and treated like the little fucktoy that she is here to have her pussy licked. He fucks Kailey in her cunt and licks her toes and feet. She is when she gulps his load and both get down on their knees and he strokes one out and empties his nut sack into her waiting mouth.
Watch high quality celebrities movies about binaries pictures nude celebrities fake by clicking here.

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The new Content section of UBritney.com also features a sort of little blog I decided to start doing. Basically, youll find my opinion on whats going on with Britney but also on other things such as whats going on with other Britney sites/forums and my point of view on others actions. All Ill do is tell you the truth.
Can you handle it?
If you want to read my different posts, check this main page of the Content section or the My Opinion section in the menu under Categories.

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The pop star is aiming to post a video clip of a photographer every week making a fool of him or herself on her website .

The featured photographer then becomes the winner of that week's "paparazzie" award.

The Toxic singer, 26, who last year suffered a public breakdown, is often followed by the paparazzi pack.

She has launched a successful comeback however after her troubled year, with a new album out in December while she is also planning an appearance on ITV1's X Factor.

Her website explains in the dedicated section: "Terrorizing Britney has unfortunately become a daily part of the paparazzi's lives. So, we've decided to start calling these maniacs out each week by awarding a PapaRAZZIE to the worst of the worst!

"Each week we will be presenting an award to the most outrageous and ridiculous pap moment and you have to check out what we found this week."

The website also features a clip of Mary Kate Olsen being harassed by a paparazzi, with the caption "Silly photog... little does he know that Mary Kate is paptose intolerant. Just like us."

The singer last month walked free from court after a jury failed to reach a verdict on charges of driving without a valid licence.

The alleged offence occurred at a time when Spears' life appeared to be spiralling out of control, culminating in her admission to a psychiatric hospital.

Source:http://www.telegraph.co.

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Hi, Guys…
by TheRealMoriarty Aug 11th, 2008
04:25:38 AM
… to those asking, I’ll try a new tact in this thread. Harry took his CLONE WARS review down at the request of Lucasfilm, who have chosen to enforce an embargo on reviews on our site. There may, in fact, be other outlets who have reviews up currently. That is not something we can control. Harry will repost his same review when he is able to. I hope that explains it, but if you have further questions, I’ll try answer them. I’d really rather this talkback were about the great Bernie Brillstein, though.”
Here’s the original review:
“Harry hated THE CLONE WARS!
I’ve never hated a STAR WARS film before. I have weathered Jar Jar and any number of Ewoks. I survived Hayden and a wooden Portman. I even accepted Jake Lloyd. I handled all that because it felt like STAR WARS.
I can accept all of Lucas’ flaws, so long as at its heart it felt like Star Wars. I can deal with politics in Star Wars. I can deal with trade skirmishes in Star Wars. I can deal with musical numbers, breathing in the vacuum of space. Basically – so long as it feels like STAR WARS – I can watch any of it.
Was I looking forward to STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS (2008)?
A!
I was dying. After Genndy’s CLONE WARS – I felt that perhaps Lucas “got it” – and that this new animated series was taking a lead from Tartakovsky’s brilliant assembly of pieces. Genndy’s CLONE WARS got STAR WARS better than anyone has got it since Lawrence Kasdan and Irvin Kershner. Genndy took designs and characters that folks were dissatisfied with and made them cool. He did this by using and adapting the themes created by John Williams, the wholly perfect entity involved with Star Wars along with… the sound effects of Ben Burtt. He understood speed and motion – not just with action, but in editing. He understood classic film composition and iconography. And he knows what BADASS is.
The folks behind this STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS movie… you could tell, they looked at what Genndy did – but they didn’t understand any of it. There’s a load of battles and going boom. There’s noise everywhere – fury everywhere… but none of it is directed. The music by Kevin Kiner is criminally bad. Why they didn’t employ Paul Dinletir and James Venable is beyond me. No, no – let’s hire the composer of WALKER, TEXAS RANGER. Ahem.
Now – I made excuses for this film as I was watching it. I don’t think you understand how much I love STAR WARS. Maybe you do, maybe you do too.
Before the movie started I was firing myself up to go out after the film and buy that new $200 Hasbro Millenium Falcon. I really wanted to go buy it, and I wanted this movie to empower my brain to go through with that. Instead, I found myself at home – putting on Genndy’s THE CLONE WARS – to try and rebuild my passion – so I can go get that new Falcon.
Instead – I’m thinking I’ll just be here at home enjoying this and that’ll be all I need.
Anyway – as I was watching the film, I was excusing the sloppy shots, the sloppy use of the Clone Troopers and Droids – undoing all the awesome work that Genndy had done – and the droids are silly again. The Clone Troopers are limp. And the Jedi – they’re at 25% power from the mind of Genndy. But I was accepting that. I figured that was Lucas dialing back so that the animated series wouldn’t overpower his features.
Then they introduced Baby Jabba aka Rotta the Huttlet aka Stinky. At the point of this character’s introduction – it officially became, the worst character in the history of STAR WARS. If you hate George Lucas cutsiepoo bull – oooooooh boy. You’re gonna have a field day of venting and hatred directed at this unbelievably ing awful little .
Oh – but wait… Little Stinky the Hutt isn’t the worst character in the history of STAR WARS… because Stinky got introduced earlier in the film. As much as I hated lil Stinky… I was weathering Stinky. I seriously was. But later there was a character of such immense – offensively bad. The character was so bad, so incredibly awful – that it was a slap to the face. It woke me out of my accepting stupor and made me angry. SUDDENLY my “inner fanboy rage” was awoken.
As I watched this terrifyingly awful character named Ziro the Hutt. A seemingly female Hutt – with tattoos and make-up that sounds like a racist take on a Black New Orleans Crack-Dealing Whore. Because this Hutt speaks ENGLISH – and it is many times worse than I’m actually describing. This character was actually too much for me. So bad that every flaw I was looking past, was now a road sign to inadequacy and mediocrity. All of a sudden my brain realized that Asajj Ventress’ voice no longer was acceptable – and sure enough – the amazing Grey DeLisle, who originally voiced the character back in 2003 – had been replaced by a Nika Futterman – and that voice was missed. The character didn’t have that snarling menace anymore.
I realized that nothing in this animated film felt right. I felt time expanding. It seemed that the film was dragging – nevermind that lots of was firing all over the place – and stuff was going boom and things were being revealed. I just didn’t care because this wasn’t what I wanted.
I hated the score, the animation, the shots, the characters and most of all the retarded idiot story.
I hated the film. HATED IT. REALLY HATED IT.
Does this mean the whole Star Wars Animated Series is doomed? No – but it isn’t a good sign. So much of this is awful because of the Hutt plotlines and character. I also feel that Dave Filoni must be a hack. His work here is sloppy – and depending on writers and directing talent – individual episodes may be better. This film was several episodes all strung together – my prayer is that the individual episodes will be both great and awful – and we’ll discover which talents are responsible for each.
That said – the audience did have light applause. My father liked it. My sister felt too much was going on. Me nephew really liked it. That said – Yoko was complaining right along with me. She thought it was too. I know Moriarty liked it. Wonder what Quint and Massawyrm thought.
. I hated a STAR WARS. That ing sucks.

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Britney Spears has released the cover for her new album, Circus, and the complete track list on her website today. There are a total of 12 tracks plus a bonus track. The album is slated for a December 2 release, to coincide with Britneys 27th birthday.
The website also revealed that her next single will be Circus, which is an up-tempo track produced by Dr. Luke and Benny Blanco. I think its a nice decision. With Womanizer already a huge success on the charts, an up-tempo track will definitely help Britney maintain the momentum of her album.
Coming back to the cover, I feel it looks anything but cool. Honestly speaking, it looks nothing else but a poor design by a novice photoshop artist. Im not at all impressed by this cover art gone weird.
Hit the jump to view complete track list.

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Never seen before, all exclusive celebrities free nude ! Enjoy...
This is going to be the hottest video since the release of the first Paris Hilton Sex Tape! She goes down and dirty on Lilly before getting it good doggy style. She will bring a friend. It out of her butt and juicy pussy lips, and then he lays her back and mouth fucks her deep and hard penetration. She deepthroats his pecker and then lays back to have her pussy tongue tickled by Lilly.

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Never seen before, all exclusive celebrities free nude ! Enjoy...
This is going to be the hottest video since the release of the first Paris Hilton Sex Tape! She goes down and dirty on Lilly before getting it good doggy style. She will bring a friend. It out of her butt and juicy pussy lips, and then he lays her back and mouth fucks her deep and hard penetration. She deepthroats his pecker and then lays back to have her pussy tongue tickled by Lilly.

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Another weekend, another trip to the ER for Amy Winehouse. According to British press reports, the fragile singer was rushed to a hospital Saturday night after doctors visiting her at home on Thursday became concerned that her condition had deteriorated.
The singers British spokesperson, Chris Goodman, confirmed today that Winehouse had gone for some checkups, that she had a chest infection last week and that, given her earlier treatment for lung damage, doctors wanted to make sure everything was OK. In June, the 25-year-old singer was hospitalized with a severe lung ailment that her father, Mitch, attributed to smoking cigarettes and crack cocaine. At the time, he told reporters that she was suffering from the early stages of the incurable disease emphysema. Winehouse is expected back home today.

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Years ago, back in 1974, this author was a West Point cadet who was watching the U.S. Army introduce TM into the academy. It was presented as a scientific technique, and many officers, some friends and other cadets availed themselves of the chance to train themselves in TMs mystical method of training. A fellow cadet who was already trained in martial arts quickly learned the techniques. After initially maintaining a safe distance, this author decided to investigate TM after I got out of the military. The U.S. government gave substantial grants to get TM introduced into this country. Fortunately, Christians didnt sleep long, and exposed that TM is Hinduism. Everyone that is taught TM is initiated into it by the TM instructor singing a puja (worship) song in Sanskrit which is a hindu devotional song while incense and candles burn. Until the Christians exposed this, our national government went blithely along in promoting Hinduism into our public schools. For instance, the Dept. of Health, Education, Welfare gave a $21,540 grant for 150 high school teachers to learn TM. TM has grown to be a powerful organization, with many organizations set up attached to it. It has its international headquarters at Hotel Sonnenberg in the Swiss village of Seelisberg. When I investigated TM back in 1975, this TM instructor who was friends of mine, talked about her experience at Seelisberg. From the conversation with her it was obvious that people had had to surrender their will to the organization to go to Seelisberg, and some mind altering experiences had taken place there. She participated in the Siddhi program to be able to dematerialize, walk through walls and levitate. But the program clearly had emotionally disturbed her and others who had been in it. Once a person is involved in the higher levels of TM, you dont just walk away from this cult. From my personal observations, I discovered that TM is involved in some types of mind-manipulation, and that the organization is not above using deceit on unsuspecting people. What then becomes doubly interesting is that after observing these things, I learned that TM have a large interest in the cranial osteopathic techniques which can alter the mind and personality of a person. For instance, this author has obtained a list of TM instructors in Santa Monica, CA area who are also Doctors of Cranial Osteopathy. (But bear in mind, this whole thing is bigger than labels, when people are interested in the occult they study eclectically.) These TM Cranial Osteopaths are concentrated where TM has a secret MUM Mountain, CA training site. There are cranial doctors in the nearby towns of Aptos, Capitola, Cupertino, Hollister, Los Gatos, Salinas, Santa Cruz, Saratoga and Watsonville. Its boggles the mind that 12 cranial doctors are needed for the rural area near MUM Mountain, while L.A. only has 10. Concentrations of cranial doctors occur in close proximity to TM centers, particularly around the Maharishi University in Fairfield, 10 as well as the secret MUM Mountain training center. Other cranial DOs who are part of TM are scattered about the United States.

Another observation which I made, was that some of the people that got really big into TM are still searching for something to fill the voids and needs of their life. TM didnt turn out to be as big of an answer as they expected. TM is not the final answer. However, the Maharishi who brought TM to America has a college in Fairfield, Iowa (the Maharishi International University) and 20 North American "heavenly communities" operating in the quest to create a heaven on earth. The Maharishi International University has been used for medical experimentation on people. The close connections between the leadership of TM and the Illuminati leadership suggests that TM is being used as another haven for the NWOs mind-control to be perpetrated on unsuspecting victims. There are bone-setters in India also. Perhaps the Maharishi got his original interest in the potential for mind-control via skull manipulation in India. Wherever the interest came from, it is evident that TM in America is involved in skull manipulation for its mind-control results.

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Showing there were no hard feelings – well, maybe a few – Tom Cruise skewered his one-time Today show adversary Matt Lauer with one-liners in a surprise appearance Friday at a Friars Club roast.
Believe it or not, Matt and I are friends. Some of you may find that hard to believe, said the actor, who famously scolded Lauer on-air and called him during a discussion of psychiatry and post-partum depression during a now-notorious 2005 interview.
The roasts specialize in dirty humor that poke fun at their honorees. Cruise had a field day at Lauers expense.
When they do Where in the World is Matt Lauer, Im the one person in the world who knows where he is, said Cruise, who showed humorously doctored slides of the two of them at a backyard barbecue together, wading in a swimming pool and cuddling on a jet-ski.
We go on vacation together, claimed Cruise, who also said they speak on the phone sometimes four times a day and watch TV together for hours. Cruise also credited Lauer with advising him not to talk about his movie War of the Worlds when he appeared on Oprah Winfreys show (on which he jumped on Winfreys sofa), but to talk about his then-new girlfriend, Katie Holmes.
He said, Tom, Tom, dont be glib, Youre in love. Talk about Holmes, Lauer suggested. Be inspiring … People will love you for it, Cruise quoted Lauer as saying.
The actor also credited Lauer with advising O.J. Simpson to go into a Las Vegas hotel room and reclaim his sports memorabilia, and with advising Katie Couric to leave Today for the CBS Evening News.

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I am sick of all this talk about how Britney is on this whirlwind comeback.  I dont care if shes starting to exhibit socially acceptable behavior again.  In my book, shes still as crazy as ever - the only difference now is that her handlers have been able to reestablish some semblance of control.  I was unfortunate enough to come across her video for this morning on TV and it is awful.  Take a look here.
Ill give credit where credit is due: Britney is starting to resemble a normal human being again.  Shes lost some weight - good for her.  But this does not mean that the world wants to see you naked in a steam room.  At least I dont.  Now, if this were m A Slave 4 U Britney, or even the PhotoShopped Britney pictured above, wed be having a different conversation.
This song/video is stupid for so many reasons, all of which cannot be named here.  But Ill try to list a few reasons.
1.      The idea that in order to expose her man as a womanizer, Britney has to dress up as multiple girls.  In real life, dont people just hire private investigators to do this?  What, was Tom Sellecks mustache and Hawaiian shirt too busy to take on the job?
2.      Who was the casting director on this video?  That cheese dick who plays her boyfriend has the dumbest facial expressions ever caught on film.
3.      Britney driving that limo with her feet, which you know smell absolutely horrible.  If I had to take a guess, I bet they smell like a mixture of bologna thats been out of the refrigerator for 9 days and sweat.  Since Mike Clark was the first to poster this notion, and I usually agree with everything he says, she must use her feet to drive in order to keep herself from falling asleep at the wheel.

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However, as youll see below, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat doesnt seem to quite get the point of Cybersex. Then again, maybe he does
Actual Cybersex Log:

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, Im toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: Im 6 and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Wal-Mart. Im also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner. Its smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you! Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: Were in my bedroom. Theres soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. Im looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: Im gulping, Im beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: Im pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung Now Im unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: Im moaning softly.
Wellhung: Im taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: Im throwing my head back in pleasure.
The cool silk slides off my warm skin.
Im rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hands suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse. Im sorry.
Sweetheart: Thats OK, it wasnt really too expensive.
Wellhung: Ill pay for it.
Sweetheart: Dont worry about it. Im wearing a lacy black bra.
My soft breasts are rising and falling,
as I breath harder and harder.
Wellhung: Im fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think its stuck. Do you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly Im reaching back undoing the clasp.
The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts.
My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? Im picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: Im arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
Wellhung: Im dropping the bra. Now Im licking your, you know, breasts. Theyre neat!
Sweetheart: Im running my fingers through your hair. Now Im nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are cover! ed with spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: Im so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: Im wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: Im taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
Sweetheart: OK. Im pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing you hard tool. Wellhung: Im screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: Im pulling up my miniskirt. Take of my panties!
Wellhung: Im pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you ummm wait a minute.
Sweetheart: Whats the matter?
Wellhung: Ive got a pubic hair caught in my throat. Im choking!
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: Im having a coughing fit! Im turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: Im running to the kitchen, choking wildly.
Im fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: Im drinking a cup of water. There, thats better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me lover.
Wellhung: Im washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: Im on the bed arching for you.
Wellhung: Im drying the cup. Now Im putting it back in the
cabinet. And now Im walking back to the bedroom.
Wait, its dark, Im lost. Wheres the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: Im tuggin off your pants. Im moaning. I want you so badly
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately our naked bodies pressing each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why dont you take off your glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I cant see very well without them. I place the glasses on the! night table.
Sweetheart: Im bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. Im fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover!
Wellhung: I find the bathroom and its dark. Im feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: Im waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: Im done going. Im feeling around for the flush handle, but I cant find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: Whats the matter now?
Wellhung: Ive realized that Ive peed into your
laundry hamper. Sorry again. Im walking back to the bedroom now,
blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now Im going to put myyou know in your you knows thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: Im touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, Im having a little trou! ble here.
Sweetheart: Im moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I cant stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: Im flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: Im limp. I cant sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: Im standing up and turning around, an incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: Im shrugging with a sad look on my face, my wiener is all floppy. Im going to get my glasses and see whats wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. Im getting dressed. Im putting on my underwear. Now Im putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now Im squinting, trying to find the night
table. Im feeling along the dresser, knocking
over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: Im buttoning my blouse. Now Im putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: Ive found my glasses. Im putting them on. My God!
One of our candles fell on the curtain.
The curtain is ! on fire!
Im pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell! Im logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh nooooo!
Sweetheart: Bye!!.

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Some of you might be thinking, are you kidding? But Im   not. I have probably seen this film anywhere from 40-100  times. Somewhere in there. Its a lot. I can recite dialogue easily. Thats why writing this post will be so facile and enjoyable. Its straight from the heart and my memory.
If it werent for the sarcastic jokes among the characters about what a fucktarded situation they have found themselves in, this movie would take itself too seriously and it would have failed miserably. However, the constant banter between Valentine McKee (Bacon) and Earl Bassett (Ward) drives the movie forward with more force than the actual plotline of giant graboids trying to stubbornly get at and swallow each and every one of them.
The other character that simply cannot be missed is that of Michael Grosss Burt Gummer, an anti-government, warloving, gun toting survivalist (and probably conspiracy theorist). Gross throws himself into his character with a gusto that almost overshadows Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward - almost. But the duo manages to keep the spotlight on them as the main protagonists and thus the audience in stitches.
Then, if you go ahead and watch Tremors II (I cannot in good conscience put my endorsement behind III or IV), you will discover that they expounded on the fact that these creatures are and they evolve quickly. So it would make sense if the graboids (dubbed so by Walter Chang, right before hes eaten alive in his own store) would go where there was slightly more population, even if it was just invading a giant cattle ranch. We cant really understand why theyd prefer the laborious chase of going after people over less intelligent animals. Perhaps its the ultimate thrill for them and they feel deserving of their meal after theyve managed to suck down a human. We cant really be sure.
And it begs to be asked after youve seen the movie as many times as I have, but: why dont the graboids move on to another town instead of just waiting out the deaths of 14 people? The town of Perfection, Nevada shows its population to be 14 at the beginning but it easily loses a handful up front before we get to the main crew desperately trying to stay alive.
We just know that the graboids are dumb enough to get killed (spoiler alert!) by running full speed into a concrete aqueduct and taking the bait of a lit homemade bomb. The other one gets shot up by Burt and his wife (McEntire), since their entire rec room is one big wall of guns and ammo. Its not to be missed. And the last, most graboid, who manages to avoid getting shot or blown up? They trick it into careening through a cliff wall and falling to its death where the filmmakers give us the glorious money shot of its guts and blood exploding out of its gigantic, carnivorous body. The movie is not for those who cant stand a little gore, Ill be honest. Its all in good fun. This movie just had to be as fun to make as it is to watch and take it all in.
There is an entire plot synopsis on Wikipedia if you click here. If you really want the blow by blow without having to watch the movie, then knock yourselves out. But I have yet to meet a person who doesnt enjoy the film on some level, even if its just to shake his or her head and say, This is retarded.
My favorite character aspects are the incessant cigarette smoking (this was before the film industry started cracking down on how much influence this has on todays youth), Kevin Bacons southern/hick twang, the constant swearing (Son of a goddamn bitch), the long looks between Val and Rhonda (the Plain Jane love interest who catches Vals eye eventually) and Val and Earl playing Rock/Paper/Scissors every so often to see who has to take on an unwanted task.

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A family that texts together, stays together. Or at least it stays in touch better.
Todays families with minor children are much more likely than any other household types to have cellphones and use the Internet, a study by the Pew Internet American Life Project reports today.
The phone survey of 2,252 adults, between Dec. 13, 2007, and Jan. 13, 2008, also shows that families use those technologies to stay in touch with each other throughout the day.
It used to be in the old Dick and Jane days, husbands went off to work, wives went off to a different job or else stayed home … and the kids went off to school, says study co-author Barry Wellman, professor at the University of Toronto. And not until 5:30, 6 oclock did they ever connect.
But now husbands e-mail wives. Daughters call moms. Sons e-mail parents.
s a new kind of connectedness being built inside of families with these technologies, says Lee Rainey, director of the project.
When Jim Daly, an editor for a Web company who lives in Alameda, Calif., wanted to call his teenage daughter down to dinner, he called her on her cellphone.
He knew shed answer because text message and cellphone messages are much more important to her, says Daly, 48.
Daly is in constant contact with his wife, a freelance editor who works from home, during the day via e-mail and cellphone.
So are millions of other Americans. According to the survey:
• About 89% of married (or partnered) parents with children own multiple cellphones.
• 66% have high-speed broadband Internet connections in their homes (compared with a national average of 52%).
• 70% of couples in which both partners have cellphones contact each other daily just to say hello, 64% contact each other to coordinate schedules, and 42% of parents contact their children daily using a cellphone.
When the Internet arose, some worried that it would pull families apart, Rainie said. But for perhaps the first time, this study indicates fairly definitely that technology is bringing them together by allowing them to have constant contact, Rainie says.
Most families say technology has either helped their communication with other family members or made no difference. Very few say it has made communication worse.
For some kids, that might become a double-edged sword, but Emily Wilson, 15, of New York City loves it. For me, its really easy and its been a big benefit. I can always get in contact with (her parents) no matter what. Im never out of touch with them.
For instance, when Emily was shopping for sunglasses in Manhattan, she became concerned what her mother, who was in the Hamptons, would think of them. So Emily sent a picture — via BlackBerry — of her modeling the new shades. Within seconds, her mom sent a message back: Approval granted.
Now she says she knows I can go shopping without my mom and have her approve what Im buying.
Her mom, a longtime techie, loves it, too. Her husband, Fred, likes to Twitter. Her whole family stays in touch electronically.
re a very close-knit family, says Joanne Wilson. But it takes the connection to a whole other level. Theres a constant connection.

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"The thing about Katie Holmes is that she's so right for the part," said Miller, a filmmaker and wife of Academy Award-winning actor Daniel Day-Lewis.
Hollywood stars such as Julia Roberts and Sean Combs have in recent years tried their talents on the New York stage and brought huge buzz to their productions. Holmes' Broadway entree was no different; "All My Sons" was the highest-grossing play on Broadway in its first full week of previews, taking in $684,002.
Still, Holmes simply is a supporting player in the drama. "All My Sons" is about businessman Joe Keller, played by John Lithgow, whose factory supplied defective cylinder parts to the military, resulting in the deaths of 21 pilots during World War II. Diane Wiest plays Keller's wife; Patrick Wilson his idealistic son; and Holmes the son's fiancee and daughter of Keller's disgraced partner.
For theatergoer Marra Gad, the play was the thing and a performer besides Holmes.
"I realize that people are really excited about Katie Holmes making her debut and obviously the stargazing that's going on, but Patrick Wilson is a remarkable actor and I'm thrilled to see him on stage again," said Gad. "I love theater, so I'm excited to see a show like `All My Sons' brought back to Broadway."
Producer Eric Falkenstein said the play is "ultra-relevant" considering the Iraq War, and praised Holmes and the cast.
"She was never difficult, always interested," said Falkenstein.
Referring to the media attention brought on by her celebrity, he added, "She handles it so well. The other cast members handle it so well."
Of course, the protesters had a different perspective. The mostly young demonstrators, many wearing masks like those in the film "V for Vendetta," said they wanted to save Holmes from Scientology. Anonymous is a group connected by the Web that protests monthly outside Scientology buildings.
"We're here to just protest Scientology in general," said 22-year-old Alex Vanino. "But our main focus right now is getting Katie out of Scientology. There's been news going around the tabloids saying she would like to get out. It's unverified, but it would be nice to encourage that.

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Britney Spears' new single "Womanizer" made a record-breaking leap to top spot on Billboard's Hot 100 singles chart on Wednesday, underscoring her musical comeback after making headlines with her personal woes.

Billboard said the song, the first from a new Spears album due for release in December, jumped from No.96 to No.1 in the past week and returned Spears to the top of the list for the first time since her 1999 debut single "Baby One More Time."

"Womanizer" is also No. 1 on iTunes charts in Canada, France, Spain and Sweden, Spears' record company Jive said.

Billboard said the unprecedented leap of "Womanizer" was spurred by first-week download sales of 286,000, the biggest opening week tally by a female artist since Nielsen SoundScan began tracking digital downloads in 2003.

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