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Agincourt by Bernard Cornwell
Publisher: HarperCollins
Pub. Date: January 20, 2009
ISBN-13: 9780061578915
464 pp

The battle of Agincourt, when its remembered outside of academia, is chiefly known as the heroic backdrop for Shakespeares Henry V and its legendary line We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.

In reality Agincourt was a stunning and bloody victory for the English in the fall of 1415, a triumph over stunning odds to secure Henry V the French crown he desired, but would never live to wear.

Bernard Cornwell, bestselling author of numerous historical novels, tries his hand at the battle in the simply named Agincourt. While the book may lack the signature quotes of the Bard, it establishes a poetry of its own as it brings medieval France to life on its pages.

Agincourt tells the tale of Nicholas Hook, a veteran of a destructive family feud that follows him into his service to the King. When he fails to stop his old nemesis from raping and killing a girl he strikes a priest and becomes an outlaw, seeking safety from the gallows among the archers sent to fight Henrys war. At the defeat of Soissons he is the lone archer to escape the brutal French retaliation and helps a French girl escape the carnage - a girl that would become the focus for both the renewed feud and the terrible anger of her noble French father.

Throughout the book, from London to the wet fields of France, Nicholas is aided by the infrequent but insistent voices of St. Crispin and Crispinian, patron saints of Soissons, the French town butchered by its own army. It is on their Feast day - October 25th - that the sickly and vastly outnumbered English army meets the French on the field of Agincourt and history is made.

In the book there is no denying the greatness and wonder of the victory, and it will be difficult for a reader to distance themselves from the urge to cheer on Hook and his companions. Yet, spiritual guides aside, this is no whitewashed, censored version of history.

The campaign is brought to life with vivid depictions of the violence and filth that was a soldiers lot, a life lived in a time where dysentery and starvation were just as feared as any crossbow bolt. Without disturbing the flow of the narrative, Cornwell introduces the reader to the religious, technological, political, and social status quo of the era and its people, and the novel is that much richer for the attempt.

That holds true for his depiction of Agincourt itself. It is a miracle, true, by almost any definition, and a marvel of history. But it was also brought about by the French having to cross a muddy field ploughed deep for winter wheat; by their lack of a unified command structure; by the deadly barrage of the archers; and by the cocky bravado of the French meeting the insanely overconfident Henry head-on on an autumn day.

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04/12/09 Positive Can't say much about the place other than paradise. Comfortable, and simply adorable. We really enjoyed the patio overlooking the beach every morning while we sipped on our coffee. Very relaxing. Literally steps away from the quiet beach and miles away from the busy city. If you are seeking a restful and secluded place for your future vacation then stay here!!! Accommodations were nothing but exceptional (they even had nail polisher remover and cotton balls!!!) We visited the Dole pineapple plantation and it was really fun and short. And great tasting pineapples!!! Please feel free to contact us if you have questions for site seeing and shopping. Linda, Michelle, and Mom, Ventura, CA

03/31/09 Positive Great experience. The beach was pristine and all to ourselves. The water was calm and very inviting.There was plenty of snorkel gear provided for us to use. The beaches on this part of the island were beautiful, calm and empty. The drive into waikiki was beautiful and easy, about 30 minutes.This side of the island is far enough from waikiki to get away, but close enough to drive into as we did. The condo itself was great, kitchen was fully stocked. stephanie, monterey,ca 831-643-0749

03/08/09 Positive We had a wonderful stress free vacation at Mr. Chen's Condo. The location was fabulous and the beach was empty. How can it get better than that? It was very close to the Polynesian Cultural Center and the Bonzai Pipeline. The Condo was very nice with many updates to make it very comfortable. We hope to return soon. The Lemperle's, San Diego, Ca. (619)733-7915

02/16/09 Positive My wife and I spent 3 nights at this condo and really enjoyed it. Its in a perfect spot to really see all of the island and just far enough away from downtown to feel like you are away from the rat race. The beach is really nice although we were unlucky with the weather. The natives told us that the windy overcast weather we experienced was unusual but we were able to get one good day at the beach. This condo is a great value for anyone looking to get away from the crowds but not spend a fortune. The condo is decorated really nice and has everything you need. jim richards, vista, ca

02/12/09 Positive Can I just say...BEAUTIFUL?!!! It's steps away from the beach. He has so much snorkeling equipment (fins, masks, snorkels)... You can snorkel right out in front of the property. There is a private beach, really peaceful... So one way you get an amazing view of the beach, and the other way, you get a view of the beautiful mountains... So PERFECT! The condo has internet access, tv, huge king sized bed, futon, enclosed patio (but the breeze just flows right through). Towels, laundry facilities in the unit, pots, pans, cups, blankets, pillows... Seriously, everything you need is there! It's a very nicely decorated unit!!!! But also has that beachy, laid-back Hawaiian feel to it. I am SOOOOOO glad I found this place! I loved it so much here, that I am seriously considering buying a unit in the complex. Stay here, you wont regret it! I give it tons of thumbs up! Sasha, San Diego, CA 8583617782

02/10/09 Positive Excellent property, super clean, no bugs or wet or anything negative, lots of supplies, dishes etc. Excellent size, everything worked great, super great beach, quiet with excellent security, great people in building. But the best part is the owner, so honest, upstanding and genuinely concerned about his guests. Don't be afraid to rent from this owner, he didn't get all these positive comments for nothing - didn't get to meet him but he felt like family via emails and the phone. Go enjoy, you will really be glad to get away from Waikiki and still be close to everything. Camilla, Alberta, Canada 780-264-8300

02/09/09 Positive Had a great time! It was nice to have all the snorkel gear and boogie boards and not have to rent them! Beach was great and the condo has everything. Shawna, Mtn. Home ID

01/31/09 Positive This was our first trip to Hawaii, and although we only stayed here for 3 days, it was an absolutely positive experience. The snorkeling equipment was used every day, and it was so awesome to wake up to the sound and view of the ocean. We were experiencing Oahu as much as we could during our short stay, so did not spend much time actually being indoors, but it was a very relaxing and calming place to return to at the end of our adventures. Very clean and well supplied, it felt like our home away from home. The gentlemen who work there were also very helpful and friendly. This made for an excellent first impression of Hawaii-- Thank you so much! (Punaluu is so charming!) Rebecca Petersen, Seattle, WA (206) 226-1516

01/13/09 Positive Our little family lives in Waikiki and it was so nice to get away from the city. It was so beautiful and relaxing, there's boogy boards which our one year old loved, snorkeling, fishing right off the beach or just taking a tan at the beach which is steps away and also the pool right out the back lanai, internet in the condo also the condo was beautifully furnished with a great breeze from the beach. There were so many games, movies,and music provided, that we never could run out of fun. Like Mario Brothers(Nintendo 64) or Hitman (X-box)....fun for kids. We live here and we enjoyed ourselves on this get-a-way it helped bring us closer together and our child slept better. Don't believe us try it! T he beach is so calm and I really loved that it is was not crowded and everyone was very friendly. There is Sunset Beach, Polynesian Cultural Center, 7-11, and many places to eat, it is so beautiful at night with the full moon shining on the ocean as we were eating dinner on the outside lanai. The condo is well set up and has everthing you could want right at your fingertips, we rate it a "10"......Aloha Raphael,Holly Joshua Gutierrez, Honolulu,Hawaii

11/29/08 Positive The unit is very well equipped, clean and bright. The screened lanai is a pleasant place to take a meal or just to sit and enjoy the sound of the surf and the view. The beach is quiet and safe to swim in even in the winter high surf conditions when we visited in November. The owner has recently had ceiling fans installed which work very well at maintaing a comfortable temperature and airflow throughout the apartment. The owner and the lady who does the cleaning are both very pleasant to deal with and add to the enjoyment of a visit to this vacation rental. A minor problem with the wireless internet was dealt with immediately by phoning the owner who arranged for a very competent and very pleasant computer consultant. Should we ever visit Oahu again we will certainly try to rent this unit again John Elsie Christian, Kagawong, ON, Canada

10/05/08 Positive What a wonderful condo for us to enjoy on our very first trip to Hawaii in September this year. Very nicely decorated, very clean and within 30 steps to the beach, where the water was absolutely beautiful calm. Everyday we practically had the beach to ourselves, where we made use of the snorkling equipment provided. We saw many different beautiful schools of fish, a morey eel a sea turtle one day. We enjoyed sitting out on the lanai every morning to have our breakfast and enjoy the view. If you turn right out of the condos, you can enjoy a very nice 30 minuite drive to Sunset Beach and watch the surfers. Another 15 minutes or so to we were at Haleiwa with its cool atmosphere, plenty of nice restaurants and shops. We loved driving to Waikiki and shopping at the International Market. There is just so much to do, but the best thing is you get to come home to such a great relaxing place. THANKS SO MUCH EMMANUEL! David Nancy Bennett David Nancy Bennett, Midlothian, Virginia 804-516-5236

08/19/08 Positive We stayed for a week in August and had a great time. The condo is exactly as advertised - the beach really is 30 steps away and totally secluded. If you're looking to get away from the frenzy of Waikiki and relax while you're in Hawaii I definitely recommend this condo! Patrick, Vancouver, Washington

08/12/08 Positive Had a great time on vacation at Pat's in Unit #116. No surprises were encountered during the trip. Everything was handled very well and in a professional manner. Location of this unit was ideal. Mirizzi Family, Sugar Land, TX

07/31/08 Positive Our family had a wonderful seven day visit at the condo. Before arriving, we were a little concerned about finding comfortable accommodations for all six of us. Upon arriving we were pleased to find that there was plenty of room and bedding for all. Everything was as described on the website. Boogie boards and snorkeling equipment were great and everyone was able to find equipment that fit! Kitchen was well stocked with utensils, spices and basics. Pool, patio area and beach were only steps away. (Great area for snorkeling and calm beach for the kids.) Computer with internet was a big help. Always felt safe on the beach and in the neighborhood. We were a little apprehensive before arriving because we had found the condo on the internet. We are now totally thrilled with the rental. Emmanuel always responded quickly when we had questions or concerns prior to our arrival. He also checked in by phone during our stay to be sure all was ok. Feel free to call me if you have any concerns prior to renting. (530) 559-0105 Ron Ron, Northern CA (530) 559-0105

07/14/08 Positive Beautiful location for your family to rest and relax. Condo has everything you need from cooking to playing on the beach. Never more then 10 people on the beach private and secluded. Would highly recommend this TROPICAL PARADISE for your next vacation. Thank you Mr Chen. Steele's, Broomfield, CO

07/02/08 Positive Fantastic! This condo is right on the beach. I love the three dining tables with umbrellas adjacent to the swimming pool area. I didn't get a sunburn and I was out in the sun for 2 days on the beach. I had a nice glass of wine and some snacks at the tables as the sun set on the beautiful beach. The water is calmer early in the morning. I found the afternoon surf and undertow quite strong. I would recommend swimming in the morning if possible. The condo was great. Highly recommended. Donalee, Honolulu, HI

05/28/08 Positive We just returned from a wonderful vacation at Mr. Chen's condo. As past guests have commented, we too were a little hesitant renting on line but you can rest assured, it is exactly as described in print and in pictures. This truly was THE BEST unit in the building. You cannot get any closer to the beach, which had no more than 6 people on it at any given time. The sunrises were amazing and Mr. Chen supplies you with everything you could possibly need for a really enjoyable holiday. The King size bed was sooo comfortable! This is definitely the place to stay for a quiet, relaxing time. We look forward to our return next year. Mahalo! The Allen Family Kathleen Allen, Richmond, British Columbia 604-271-7377

05/20/08 Positive If you are looking for a quiet place to stay right next to the beach this is the place. Away from the busy Waikiki hustle and bustle it's like a home away from home. We love this place so much that we are definitely going to come back again. Mike

04/28/08 Positive 4-15-2008 Just got back from a wonderful week. Great beach,nice weather and cond, was everything Mr. Chen said it would be. Great place to spend time with family,this part of Oahu is nice and quiet with nice trade winds to keep you cool. Water is nice,we saw lots!! of turtles,fun to watch. Hope to be back,we had a great time!!!!Jill,Jim,and David Jill Bauman, Portland Oregon

03/15/08 Positive We just got back from Hawaii and are making plans to go again. Mr. Chen's condo was extremely accomodating. We stayed there with our four kids. It was wonderful to have plenty of boogie boards, masks, snorkels, coolers, etc. to use. We also made use of the washer and dryer and DVD player. Anyone would be very comfortable staying here, and the beach is AWESOME. Thank you Mr. Chen. By the way, we did receive our full deposit back, which also was great. Sue, Olympia, WA

02/25/08 Positive My husband and I just got back from a glorious week at Emanuel's condo on the lovely windward coast. If you are looking for a quiet, empty, beautiful beachfront place,this is it. The condo is simple but very clean, and well-stocked. We have our own snorkeling gear, but he does stock the place with lots of stuff if you don't. There are beach chairs, boogie boards, and lots of videos, books, etc. (we never used those once!) The beach is safe for kids, because it's protected by the reef 1/2 mile (?) away, but it's also great for snorkeling. I saw a 400-500 lb. sea turtle a few hundred feet out toward the reef. There are plenty of fish and sealife! Many of the people are retired residents and very friendly. Even Ken, the caretaker/gardener, was super helpful with snorkel/travel tips. The north shore waves/ Haleiwa town is about 20-30 mins. north, and Kaneohe Bay about the same distance south. This is NOT the place if you like to party, drink, club and have Waikiki style beaches and fancy accomodations. We never saw more than 7-8 people at a time on the entire stretch of beach. Also, the washer/dryer is very convenient- you go home with clean laundry! I was worried renting off of craigslist, but it really worked out. sheila, Central Valley, CA 209 722 8302

02/19/08 Positive My wife and I stayed here in mid Jan 08. The condo turned out to be an excellent place to stay. Just minutes from the PCC, a must see in our book, and just a half-hour or so to the North Shore. The condo was clean and nicely furnished and we enjoyed the free internet access. Thanks Mr. Chen Anonymous

02/08/08 Positive I enjoyed the fact that the beach was literally 30 steps away. It is a beautiful location with the ocean and waves rocking you to sleep. Anonymous

01/01/08 Positive We just got home (12/31/07) from a one week stay at Mr. Chen's condo. Everything from start to finish was a wonderful experience!! He is very quick to respond to your emails and I was very impressed to get a personal phone call from him before our arrival. It was a pleasant drive from Honolulu and I could do it like I lived there after a couple of days. The weather did not quite work in our favor to partake in all of the beach gear, but we definitely want to try again when it is not Winter. Everything was fabulous and it felt like home. Would never stay in a hotel when the beach is right outside the door. Who could ask for anything more! It made our first trip to Hawaii very enjoyable and much more relaxing with a 1 year old and his 8 year old sister! THANKS MR CHEN and LISA too!! Kellee, Sacramento, CA

12/31/07 Positive What a great place to stay! We spent 11 days here. Washer/Dryer/Coffee Maker/Broadband access with a computer. Books/DVDs/Boogie Boards/ Snorkel equipment and a fabulous beach to use it. Kaya's little store within strolling distance. also a SubWay there. Very convenient to many attractions. We will be back :) Thanks Tom Tom Bennett 252-548-0993

12/14/07 Positive Thank you so much for allowing us to rent your condo for a couple days. We loved it! The beach access was unbeatable! We were very comfortable and felt right at home. Thanks so much for all the little extras. Mr. Chen was a pleasure to work with! Tess Scott Pyrah, Boise, ID 208-376-9976

12/12/07 Positive This condo was everything the ad mentioned! Emmanuel Chen responded very promptly to all e-mails. I must admit that I was a bit nervous to book a condo on line, however, reserving this condo put all my fears aside, it had all the ammenities one could ever need! The beach truly is spectacular and secluded. And as other guests have mentioned, the bed was very comfortable and the unit very clean. I would highly recommend your next vacation on the North Shore of Oahu and staying at Mr. Chen's condo! PS: we received our damage deposit one week after we returned home! (Nice!) Mark and Kim Adams, Bellingham, WA 360-671-0643

11/03/07 Positive Wow, what a great place. Thank you Emmanuel for a great vacation. The condo accomodated all 5 of us, 4 adults and 1 two year old. The condo was completely stocked with everything you need for a beach holiday, snorckles, boogy boards, even plenty of beach toys for the kids. Kitchen is fully stocked for creating a great meal. Beds are comfortable and linens are fresh and clean. It was good to have a washer and dryer in the unit. The location is perfect, just steps from the very secluded beautiful white sand beach. Never saw more than 2-4 people on the beach at a time. The pool, is also just outside the door. This place is great for sleeping, you can hear the ocean waves breaking all day and night. So nice to get up in the morning and have your coffee just steps from the beach. The time of year we went, October, the weather is perfect. The location to outside activities is perfect. The Polyesian Cultural Center is just minutes away. The North Shore to watch surfers is just a 10 minute drive. The super market is also just minutes away. The little store, Kaya's, just across the street and down a bit is a perfect spot to pick up small items and a lovely little walk. All the amenities of the big city in a small rural town. If you like a beach vacation, but don't like the city life, crowds and traffic, then this condo at Pat's at Punaluu is the perfect place. We will be back. Mark Debbie Biggers, Ramah, NM

08/20/07 Positive I just wanted to say I really enjoyed my stay at the condo. It was a tough life. Getting up, drinking my coffee, walking 2 minutes to the small store down the way and buying the paper. Then a little walk on the beach, snorkeling and reading on the beach for the rest of the day. Being on the first floor and in the corner unit made everything convenient and noiseless. The weather was great and when it rained it was just brief spurts. This was the best way to visit Hawaii and your unit lacked for nothing. I'm so glad I found your place. Judy Namanny Campbell, California Dick and Bev Greene, Bridgman, MI 280-465-3524

08/15/07 Positive We stayed Aug 5-12, 2007. We arrived very late at night but had no problems finding it or getting in. As was stated in ad it was very stocked with supplies. Kids loved the boogie boards. The beach was right there, perfect location. We never went to another beach for swimming, too convenient. Loved being away from Waikiki. The price was great too. Mr. Chen was very accommodating with our extra day also. We would recommend this condo to anyone. Jackson Family, Lindon, UT

07/28/07 Positive We stayed at the condo from 7/16 thru 7/23 2007. The condo was very clean, airy and extremely comfortable. It was also stocked with all sorts of swim equipment; fins, goggles, masks and boogie boards. It made a huge difference to have a turnkey furnished apartment to come home to at the end of a busy day instead of a cramped hotel room. I was a little nervous about renting over the internet, but Mr. Chen made the process a very positive experience. He was professional, communicative and friendly. I must say, that the level of service and customer care he provided is very hard to find these days. When we had problems with the microwave, Mr. Chen arranged for a replacement within 2 hours. My son still is talking about his new friend Emmanuel who took such good care of us. The beach is literally 80 feet from the condo's front door. It is also very calm water. We were able to swim here when the current at some of the North Shore beaches was too rough. We never had to share the beach with more than three of four people and the gorgeous mountain backdrop was way more impressive than the Waikiki hotel skyline. I highly recommend this condo. The price is hard to beat and you definitely get well beyond your money's worth. We will be back next summer, if not sooner. Thanks so much for a great week! The Hunt Family, Vancouver, WA

03/26/07 Positive We had a great time at the condo! We were fairly busy during our stay, but it was so relaxing to come home to a quiet and beautiful condo on the beach. The neighbors were friendly and extremely helpful. We would definitely stay there again.

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Hi! Im Russkere and Im shamelessly hawking my art here! My art focuses primarily on parodies of women in trouble, including, but Limited to Superherorines! Popular TV and Movie characters! Popular Commercials! Women in uniform! -Sports! And my favorite, CHEERLEADERS!!!! The art runs from pinups All kinds of Sex Monster /tentacle sex you name it!. I do art commissions as well contact me at ruwin@prodigy.net or check out my Commission section for rates and policies! If youre interested, check out my free site at Renderotica. http://www.renderotica.com) in the Main gallery, deviant art.com, under russkere, or my Pay site at Erotic Illusions (http://russlair.eroticillusions.

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Where the Boys Are
By Al Weisel
US Magazine, June 1996, pp. 90-98, 117-118

Male supermodels don't throw tantrums, give attitude or make moviesyet. They're hot right now, but how long will they last?

Imagine you're walking down the street in New York City on a beautiful sunny day when suddenly you notice something strange: People are being nice to you. They're smiling at you. Strangers say hello as they pass. Women lower their sunglasses; men stare into your eyes. This is no dream. You're supermodel Joel West, and everybody wants you.

"I don't think I will ever quite accept the attention," says West, 20, who signed a one-year, seven-figure contract with Calvin Klein last August. "People whispering, talking about me. The acknowledgment of society knowing who I am wherever I go." Of course, West's predicament is not news. Supermodels had been treated like celebrities long before West was launched into the world by the band of his Calvin Klein underwear. What is news is that West, thanks in part to those Calvin's, is one of the first male models to become an international sex object.

Not long ago, the idea of male models as sex objects was almost laughable, if not suspect. Men's fashion represented just a fraction of the industry, and men who worried about their looks were considered, somehow, less masculine. Male models, in turn, were treated as mere props and background-anonymous walk-ons who made far less money than their female counterparts. But changing attitudes toward male beauty - reflected in and even propelled in part by Klein's advertising campaigns-have empowered men in the only profession (besides, perhaps, the world's oldest) in which they had been second-class citizens.

FASHION WEEK IN NEW YORK: AT CALVIN KLEINTHE MOST prestigious of the New York menswear showsmodels listen in rapt attention as Klein recites his pre-show instructions. "Don't look serious," he says. "But no big smiles. You already look like you could wear a $2,000 suit, so you don't have to try to look proud." Klein makes a quick exit, then returns just as quickly. "I just thought of something else," he says. "If there's one word to describe the feeling, think sex."

One of the sexiest models isn't here today. Tyson Beckford, who made history last year as the first African-American male to ink an exclusive deal with a major designer, is prohibited by his contract with Polo Ralph Lauren from doing other designers' shows. So it's up to models like Alex Lundqvist, 24, a sweet-faced Swede with long blond hair and a wispy mustache and goatee, has compelling eyes, clear and blue. Fellow Wilhelmina model Mark Vanderloo is a trim Dutchman with spiky blond hair. At 27, he's the world's highest-paid male model, with an annual income of more than $1 million.

Across the room, Jason Olive, a volleyball player who graduated last year from the University of Hawaii, displays his massive chest. But he's not just showing offhe says he'll be wearing a turtleneck in the show and doesn't want to mess up his makeup. "Why don't you parade around shirtless like Olive?" Lundqvist is asked, and he snaps back, "Because I think it's tacky." Then he reconsiders. "Well, maybe if I was as big as him..." Olive isn't the only model who makes Lundqvist envious. Looking over at Joel West, he whispers, "Did Joel tell you how much money he makes?"

It's natural that West would be the source of jealousy among other models. Last August the small-town boy from Indianola, Iowa, was plucked from obscurity and vaulted to the top tier of male supermodels when he signed on with Calvin Klein. Apparently, though, there is trouble in paradise. "I'm not doing many shows this year," says West, sighing. Last season he was Klein's star model. Now, he says, disappointed at his placement in the show, "I'm 57th."

IN THE LOBBY OF BOSS MODELS, A GIANT BLOWUP OF THE now infamous Calvin Klein underwear ad featuring Joel West looms: "It makes me proud," says West, who has stopped by the agency to pick up his fan mailall of which turns out to be from men." I wish some girls would write me," he says plaintively, quickly adding he doesn't mind having so many male fans. Later, West confesses, "I'm a very trusting person." Which might explain why he wasn't fazed when a photographer approached him at the Mall of America Dairy Queen in Minneapolis while he was eating a Blizzard on an outing with his church group. The photographer asked West, 17 at the time, to model for him. West's mother, Jan Gipple, was more wary, having "heard things about the fashion industry," he says, and insisted on accompanying him. "We had a five-hour drive to get him to [the shoot]," says Gipple. "It's in this abandoned warehouse, and I'm thinking, This is great; we're just going to leave you at an abandoned warehouse with this stranger. I wonder if you're going to be there when we pick you up." The photographer turned out to be aboveboard, but Gipple, 42, a veterinary technician who herself grew up in Indianola, still wasn't convinced West would make it: "In Iowa, what are the chances of your getting anywhere in modeling?"

West, however, with his otherworldly beautylithe, defined body, pouty lips and exotic eyessoon became familiar to anyone who picked up a magazine. But he had no idea just how familiar he would become. In October 1995, a couple of months after he signed on with Calvin Klein, West was propelled to instant notoriety with a controversial underwear campaign featuring him spread-eagled and clad only in his Calvins. The advertisements' sexual frankness made them ripe for attack (especially coming after Klein's much-assailed ad campaign featuring teen-age models a few months earlier), and West became nightly fodder for tabloid TV shows, which camped out in his family's yard in Iowa.

West's father, Rob West, 41, who operates a backhoe for a construction company and hasn't seen much of his son since divorcing Joel's mother when Joel was 14, says, "I. was happy he was making the money, but I didn't really like the ads. They were risqué." Gipple, on the other hand, had a more practical view: "I said, 'It's pretty hard to sell a product if you're not going to show it."' The strongest reaction, surprisingly, came from Linda J. Wachner, CEO of Warnaco, which owns Calvin Klein's underwear division; she publicly excoriated them. "This ad which appeared with this gentleman's legs spread apart was not approved by Warnaco," she said. "There are no plans to use that shot again."

West was shocked by the controversy. "I didn't understand where they were coming from," he says. "I took it very personally." Meanwhile, he had to deal with instant celebrity. "I've lost a lot of my privacy," he says. "There were a few months of adjustment where I was in limbo. I wasn't happy." He denies media reports that the pressure made him flee New York for Iowa. "I love New York," he says. "I purchased a home in Iowa to be close to my family." West shares his new housewith its circular driveway, pillars and fountain in frontwith his maternal grandparents, who take care of it when he's away. "It's like something out of Gone With the Wind," marvels his mother.

West's mother and stepfather, Michael Gipple, a fleet mechanic for the Mid American Energy Company, live just down the road with Joel's 17-year-old brother, Jake. West has nicknamed Jake "Deviant" because of his penchant for mischieflike trying to break into West's laptop. Joel's father, who grew up in and still lives in Indianola, says, "Joel looks like me and takes after his mom. Jake looks like his mom and takes after me. Jake's more wild. Joel's more laid-back."

West's high-school teachers have nothing but nice things to say about him, which isn't surprising since he was voted biggest brown-noser by his class. "Joel always had a ready smile," gushes his chemistry teacher, Irene Bertsch. "He was a very hard worker." She wasn't shocked by the ads. "I saw Joel at several swim meets, and actually there was more covered in the ad than there was in the tiny little Speedos they wear," she says.

But things in Iowa are not quite the same. "I have a lot more friends and family members," West says cynically. "People coming out of the woodwork." He says that people who once thought he was "a geeky bookworm" now think he's "cool," including his girlfriend, Joy Ashbaugh. She ignored West when they attended high school together"She was in the elite, the cool girls who hung out with the cool guys," he saysand started dating him only after he became a successful model. "I've stayed the same," he says. "The only thing that's changed is the people around me." His mother, however, has detected some changes in West. "He may be more leery of people than he used to be," she says. "Since I'm not familiar with the media, Joel kept telling me, 'Don't tell them everything, Mom, because things get twisted.'" But she also thinks "it made him very worldly. He acts a lot older than any 20-year-old I've met."

Otherwise he's the same kid she raised. "He's possessed to excel in everything he does," she says. "He drives everyone crazy being an overachiever." But there's also another side to him. "He's the biggest romantic," she says. "For his girlfriend at Thanksgiving he filled his room with balloons, had a candlelight dinner and cooked this gourmet meal. I'm thinking, Most guys would just pull up, honk, and you run out."

ONE MIGHT THINK THAT BEING AN OBJECT OF DESIRE WOULD make it easy to find a mate. But most models say maintaining a relationship is one of the difficulties of the job. Tyson Beckford, who has dated Chilli from TLC, says that in addition to the fact that "you're never home," jealousy can be a big problem. "I've dated girls, and they'll be like, 'Oh, she was looking at you,' and I'll be like, 'No, she wasn't. She was just being nice.'" One of the best things about the woman he recently started dating is that she's not jealous. "We went to a pre-Grammy party, and all these girls were coming up to me, but she was cool about it," he says.

Some models end up with the people who best know what their lives are like: other models. "Another model knows what you have to go through," says Vanderloo. "And they aren't the ugliest girls in the world, either." Ask Alex Lundqvist. He dated supermodel Nadja Auermann for more than a year (although the relationship ended in February).

For models who aren't ready to settle down, there are plenty of opportunities for fleeting pleasures. "One time I was dog tired and went out to a club for a drink," recalls 24-year-old Jason Lewis, who has been modeling for three years. "A woman recognized who I was and basically offered to go to bed with me. I said, 'That's great, but I'm really tired,' and walked out." And when he's not so tired? "I've certainly had relationships with women that lasted an evening," he says, "but I don't screw around that much. I don't want anyone greeting me with bulls, and I don't think it's fair of me to do the same."

Of course, women aren't the only ones who have crushes on guys like Lewis. The top male models, however, don't seem either publicly or privately to identify as gay. Not that they're homophobic, either. "I've had men have crushes on me," says Atlanta native Mark Fisher, 20, who is currently appearing in the new Polo Sport campaign. "I treat them the same as anybody else."

"TEN YEARS AGO, THE STANDARD MALE MODEL WAS PERFECT face, perfect body. Boring, really," says casting agent Leslie Simitch. "I think now there's a much wider range of what we consider attractive in a man." In the '70s, the elegant, square-jawed GQ look was in. In the '80s, renowned fashion photographer Bruce Weber popularized more-athletic bodies with pumped-up pectorals and chiseled abdominals. "Many male models now are scrawny," says Simitch. "And a lot have long hair."

But the idea that men can be just as sexy as womenand that male models can be marketed as sex objectswhose men's division is the largest in the worldand his New York director, Jason Kanner, have been doing everything in their power to cultivate this phenomenon and make it last. One of Kanner's first assignments when he joined the agency in 1991 was to manage Marcus Schenkenberg, now 27, who was soon to appear in a 116-page advertising supplement for Calvin Klein photographed by Bruce Weber. In the most famous shot, Schenkenberg is naked in a shower, his ripped torso dripping wet, and holding jeans in front of what he modestly refers to in Swedish-filtered English as his "fireman." Kanner had a radical plan for promoting Schenkenberg: Market him like a female model. The agency raised his rates, from $3,000 to as much as $20,000 a day, and was more selective about the jobs he took." He'd do three or four campaigns instead of 12 but get more money," explains Kanner. "This was done with women, never with men." The strategy worked: Schenkenberg was in such demand after the campaign, his rates went up, which helped increase rates for other male models as well.

One February afternoon, Kanner is looking through a sea of photographs spread out before him. He's just returned from scouting in Milan, where he chose five of the 500 men he saw. Kanner points out the attributes of the men he selected: the "sunken cheekbones, ivory skin and jet-black hair" of one, "the perfect nose, full lips and great jaw line" of another. Then, sounding like a high-school misfit getting revenge on the popular guys, he sizes up the rejects. One model "looks like a schoolteacher," he says. Of another he complains, "There's way too many odd things happening on this guy's face." Kanner knows he has an advantage over them. "When I'm 60," he says, "I'm still going to have a job."

Looks aren't everything, though, even in modeling. Jennifer Starr, who was Bruce Weber's casting assistant for four years before going free-lance recently, says that she looks for qualities that are more than skin-deep. "At first it's the physical look," she says. "But after that it's all attitude. When I find someone on the street and take a Polaroid of them, I'm looking to see how they react to me and the camera- if they're stiff, how they hold themselves. You have to be comfortable with who you are." But not too comfortable. "Sometimes after you've been in this business awhile," she says, "you've got it down, and that's not interesting to work with anymore. That spontaneity is gone."

THE STANDARDS OF BEAUTY, LIKE THOSE OF FASHION, DO change. But some models, like Tyson (Beckford is his last name, but like some of the female supermodels, he eschews his surname), are so stunningly beautiful that it doesn't matter if their look is "in" at the moment. Although he's 6-foot-1, Tyson looks smaller in person than in photographs, but his face is even more breathtaking, with Asian eyes, full lips and silky, dark skin. When he smiles, he can look as gentle as a kitten; when he frowns, as mean as a rattlesnake. Before shooting a commercial for Polo, Tyson changes clothes, taking off the baggy B-boy jeans he prefers and dancing around as he struggles to pull tight jeans over his massive thighs. Then he takes off his shirt, revealing jaw-dropping muscles as well as something one never sees under the tailored suits he wears so elegantlya rebellious streak. After he signed a Polo Ralph Lauren contract for a reported $550,000 last year, Tyson covered his arms with tattoos.

Dragons are etched on his biceps. Both forearms have Chinese inscriptions. He translates the sentence on his right forearm, a tribute to his older brother Patrick, who was murdered in a mugging four years ago. But Tyson declines to decipher the message on the other arm: "It's a secret," he says, "for me and my homies. We all got the same thing." The tattoo illustrates why he will probably survive no matter what happens to him in the treacherous waters of the fashion world. In English it reads, "Don't trust anybody."

While watching a comedian in New York's Washington Square Park in the summer of 1991, Tyson was approached by an editor for the hip-hop magazine The Source who offered him a modeling job. "This guy goes to me, 'You got pretty eyes,'" Tyson, 25, recalls. "I'm thinking, Must be some porno magazine:" But then the editor said something that piqued Tyson's interest. "The opportunities," he said, "are endless:" Two days later, Tyson had his first gig. But because he really wanted a job in the music industry, Tyson drifted out of modeling. Patrick encouraged him to pursue it. "In modeling," his brother told him coincidentally, "the opportunities are endless."

Tyson was born in the Bronx, N.Y., but the family moved to Jamaica when he was just a baby. His mother, Hilory Dixon, who once won third place in a Miss Jamaica contest, moved them back to New York when Tyson was 7 after separating from his father. She later married Lloyd Dixon, who worked for a collection agency and was always calling people up saying, "You owe us money," Tyson remembers. "I grew up not really having a father image," he says. "I used to think my stepfather was the meanest man in the world." Tyson resented being forced by Dixon, who now works for Citibank, to learn how to do taxes for the money he earned from his paper route when he was 13. "I said I'm never gonna need to know how to deal with that," he says. "But now I'm dealing with it. I didn't understand when I was a kid. He's still in there with me today. He means a lot to me."

When Tyson first moved to New York, the other kids made fun of the way he looked and talked. "I was this dark-skinned Chinese kid with an Afro who spoke with a heavy Jamaican accent," says Tyson, whose paternal grandmother is Chinese. "If you think about it, it's kind of funny. They called me Mr. Chin." Because he spoke Jamaican patois, he says, "I had to take classes to learn to speak so-called English. Since I couldn't speak too well, I had to stay back a year." After graduating at 19, he attended a community college but dropped out after one semester. Then, in August 1992, Tyson's brother Patrick was murdered. "I got in my own shell and didn't want to do nothing," he says.

A year later Tyson saw actor Kadeem Hardison on The Arsenio Hall Show talking about his mother Bethann's modeling agency. Recalling his brother's words about opportunities in modeling, Tyson went to see her.

Hardison was impressed with Tyson but cautious. "You never know who's going to take off, because you have such racism in the industry," she says." Most fashion people don't know the beauty of blacks, so you don't want to encourage someone too much. "Hardison herself was a modeland as one of the first successful black models in the '60s, a pioneer. With dreadlocks down to the small of her back and a radiant smile, she's stunning, and as tough as she is charming. When she was 19, Hardison dropped out of fashion briefly to become a corrections officer after being "inspired by The Snake Pit [the 1948 film about mental illness]," she recalls, laughing. Breaking barriers is a mission for Hardison, who with Iman co-founded the Black Girls Coalition, which lobbies the fashion industry to employ more people of color.

Hardison sent Tyson to Weber, telling him only that the photographer was important and warning Tyson that Weber would ask him to take off his shirt. "He looked like Santa Claus," Tyson recalls. "He was so sweet I was ready to jump on his lap and ask for some toys." Weber recommended Tyson to Ralph Lauren, whose offices initially intimidated him. "I was like a little B-boy sitting in this office with all these guys in suits," Tyson says. "I'm like, Aw, man, I shouldn't even be here. This was like Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous, and here comes me, a little street kid:" Surprising everyone, Lauren made Tyson the centerpiece of his campaign. Giving a black model such a high profile was a courageous act in an industry where courage is usually something you knock off a competitor and sell at a discount. Of course, the publicity didn't do Lauren any harm.

Tyson, who was named male model of the year at the VH1 Fashion Music Awards last December, has reached a level of celebrity unparalleled by other male models, becoming a hero to minorities who are not used to seeing their faces in fashion ads. Stopped at a traffic light on Wall Street, where he promised a friend of his mother's he would go to meet her love-struck co workers, he is momentarily startled when a macho black bike messenger reaches in the window of Tyson's Land Cruiser, taps him on the shoulder and asks for his autograph. But his celebrity has a price. "Sometimes I'm scared to walk down the street," Tyson says. "People try to set you up. They make jokes and say, 'I'm gonna jump under the wheel of your car so that I can sue you and get paid."' He prefers to stay home at his new house in suburban New Jersey working on his Kawasaki motorcycles.

Despite his success, however, Tyson still has to deal with racism. When he was looking to buy a new car a few years ago, several dealers refused to sell him one, no matter how much cash he had for a down payment. When he finally was able to purchase a Land Cruiser, he then had to contend with police who were suspicious of a young black man driving an expensive automobile with dealer's tags. "They pulled me over in Queens, Manhattan and Brooklyn, accusing me of stealing the car," he says. Tyson isn't the only model up against racism. Jason Olive, whose father is African-American and whose mother is German-Jewish, Irish and Chippewa, was one of the few models of color at the men's collections during fashion week. "I think it's f ed," he says angrily." I don't see why I should be the only black model in a show." Kevin Louie, one of the few Asian models in the business, says that a major-department-store representative told his agent that they didn't use Asian models. Louie, who refers to himself with mordant humor as "your ethnic quota for today," wonders why some designers don't realize who buys their clothes. "Every time you go to these designers' stores you see hordes of Japanese, Koreans and Chinese coming out with six bags apiece," he says. However, his success has inspired others. Backstage after a show, an Asian woman comes over to him, raises her fist and says, "Asian power."

MILAN (NICKNAMED "VIET MILAN" BY THE MODELS FOR ITS brutal pace during show week) is a mecca for young men who hope to make it in modeling. It's also where models get their first taste of the good and the bad the business has to offer. "Milan is crazy," says Olive. "You have guys flying in from all over the world. You feel that's all that city does: eats, drinks, sleeps fashion." It's a combination frat party and A Chorus Line audition. Fisher, who shared an unheated hotel room with two other models, arrived last January to a scene of total chaos: "They had a big party the night before," he says. "There were liquor bottles on the floor, cigarette burns everywhere, beds off the springs. I was pretty scared when I walked in to all this craziness."

During show season (in January and June), the streets are packed with male models rushing to appointments with designers, magazine editors and photographers. Casting calls can last until the wee morning hours; hundreds compete for a place in shows that have only three or four openings. At night, the models invariably end up at Club Hollywood. Fisher, who was discovered at the club by a Boss scout, says that like many cash-poor models, he ended up "dancing for dollars" there. "You get paid $150 to dance on a pedestal," he explains. "I'm not proud of it, but it paid the bills."

The fast lane in Milan has no speed limit. "A wild Italian party is like a party anywhere in the world, but there's more of it," says Olive. "There's pretty girls, but there's more of them, and they're prettier. There's drugs, but there's more drugs, used heavier. Parties last way into the morning in the most unbelievable settings. These houses are like palaces. Drugs, free sex, free everything. There's nothing you can't have."

ALEX LUNDQVIST LOOKED "LOST" IN MILAN, ACCORDING TO his pal Jason Lewis. "With all the good in this business, there's also the bad, and my first impression of Alex was that he couldn't discern between the two," Lewis explains. "That's not a comment on his intelligence. Alex just has the nicest heart. That made us want to look out for him."

Nothing like the dour Swedes in Ingmar Bergman movies, Lundqvist is walking on air. He just moved to New York, and he thinks it's the most wonderful city on Earth. He's "having a blast" with his new friends Jason Lewis and Mark Vanderloo and their Wilhelmina agent, Sean Patterson. And now that he makes thousands of dollars a day to stand around and look fabulous, he's got even more reason to smile.

Three years ago Lundqvist was making a lot less money and working much harder as a tank commander in the Swedish army. "We had this one week where we didn't have anything to eat except a banana a day," he says in his soft Swedish accent. "We had to break a hole in the ice and wash ourselves at 5:00 in the morning:" He uses his army name tag as a money clip "to remind me not to complain," he says. When he was discharged, he rebelled by growing his trademark long hair, mustache and goatee.

Lundqvist grew up on an island on the outskirts of Stockholm. In the winter he ice-skated to town like Hans Brinker. His father is a dentist, and his mother assists his father, which might sound like a good plot for a horror movie, but Lundqvist has never been on the other side of his father's drill, because he's luckily never had a cavity. He was unusually prone to accidents, though, and has scars to prove it on his forehead (he fell on the ice when he was 2, and hit his head building a treehouse), wrist (he put his hand through a glass door in high school) and back (he got stabbed in the army by one of the locals who frequently skirmished with the soldiers stationed in their town), plus assorted mementos from bust-ups on his Harley. Ten years ago his scars might have nixed a modeling career, but he had the good fortune to enter the business at a time when flawed beauty is actually an asset.

Lundqvist is seeing designers in New York to be fitted with the clothes he'll wear on the runway. He has just run into Jason Lewis at the high-tech sportswear designer Nautica. Embracing Lewis, he exclaims, "This is my new roommate," then puts him in a headlock and wrestles him to the floor like a rambunctious teen-ager.

As he walks down Fifth Avenue on his way to his next appointment, Lundqvist is so giddy you check to see if his feet touch the sidewalk. Suddenly, he spies a picture of Vanderloo on a telephone booth and stops dead in his tracks. He walks up to the poster, punches the picture at Vanderloo's shoulder and says, grinning, "Hey, buddy!"

LUNDQVIST HAS EVERY REASON TO BE ON TOP OF THE worldhe started his career just as the male-supermodel phenomenon took off. The question now is, Will it last? Michael Gross, author of Model: The Ugly Business of Beautiful Women, isn't convinced it will: "I don't believe that if you go to a mall in Indiana and ask a beer-swilling teen-ager the name of the kid in the Calvin Klein commercial, he's going to know it. The male supermodel is a marketing phenomenon that will not take hold with the masses. I hope they make a lot of money, don't get spoiled and can live real lives after living in this false bubble."

But the models have a more pragmatic view. "At the end of the year, the women always come out ahead," says Vanderloo. "But I'm not upset about it. They deserve it. I can only look into my own pockets, and I'm not unhappy."

Of course, there are always post-modeling career options. Lundqvist is saving his money to study advertising. Tyson and Lewis are talking about film careers. Hardison says she's already refused some movie offers for Tyson because he's "not ready." Tyson, however, is getting restless. "Some models eat, drink and sleep modeling," he says. "I just want to get my money and get out."

Not a bad idea when you work in an industry where one day you're hot, the next you're not. Earlier this year, during fashion week, West's relationship with Calvin Klein was modified. While he would still model for the designer's fragrance and eyewear ads, he would no longer be Klein's underwear supermodel. Replacing him is Antonio Sabato Jr. (Melrose Place). "Calvin Klein is always searching for new talent," says a Klein spokesperson dispassionately. Leslie Simitch, who worked on the casting for Klein, says, "We were looking for a good body, and we were also looking for a personality."

Boss' director of communications, Paul West (no relation to Joel) isn't going to admit defeat, however. "[Joel] is the hottest f ing supermodel in the world," he says. "Walk down the street in Chicago or Houston and say the name Joel West and the name Tyson, and see which one they know."

After fashion week in New York, Joel West immediately flew back to Iowa, where he stayed a few days before setting out to Hollywood with his best friend since the fifth grade, Cory Sinclair, an actor, to test the waters out there. Back at Boss' office, the blowup of the Calvin Klein ad that hung in the lobby, which just three weeks earlier had made West so proud, has been removed from the wall, like the painting of a crown prince toppled in a coup d'état.

Al Weisel is the co-author, with Larry Frascella, of Live Fast, Die Young: The Wild Ride of Making Rebel Without a Cause, being published in October 2005.

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Today for some reason is just a frustrating day and I think I will tell a little story to lighten things around here.  This story is based on actual events, however no finger pointing will be done and the identity of the main kid will remain secret.  It will not be revealed because I am afraid of retaliation and great bodily harm lol.
 
Once upon a time there lived a brother and sister.  They were close in age and loved each other dearly even though the mother could not tell by all the fighting done during the day.  At the end of the day brother and sister were put into the bathtub together (they were still young enough to do this) to peal off several layers of dirt, grim and who knows what else.  There was extra scrubbing involved this night because of a muddy project in the backyard and the mother wanted to make sure she had brought the right kids into the house. 
 
Brother and sister had heard the term digging to China and wanted to test the theory.  They found the perfect spot in the middle of the yard, in the garden and with the help of the neighbor kids started digging.  Since it was fall and most of the garden was picked the mother watched this going on thinking,
 
 “Oh God please let them dig till they are exhausted and go to bed early tonight!”
 
Well after a couple hours and a few feet later they found out that the further down they went the more mud they found.  The mother sprang off of the porch to start pulling kids out of the hole that was several feet down before they got stuck for good.  See she did not think they would get as far as they did, but she was sadly mistaken.  The kids had dug far enough down that they were getting into a water table that part of the town sits on.  After some crying and fussing all the dirt was returned to the hole, China would have to wait for another day I guess.  Neighbor kids were sent home to their parents, brother and sister were sent to the tub. 
 
Now this is where everything got interesting and I know the mother could feel the hairs on her head going not gray but white.  The little bit of sanity that she was holding onto for the night disappeared.  What happened was not bad but it was another one of those funny kid moments that you do not dare laugh in front of them, but you just cannot help yourself.  So here we go.
 
Once it was revealed that the proper kids were in fact in the bathtub the mother rinsed them off and decided to get sister out first.  Out came the little girl and the mother set about getting her dried off and started combing out the ten feet of rats nests sitting on top of her head.  The whole time the little boy is still playing with his toys in the tub.  Just when the mother was almost done there was a blood curdling scream coming from the bathroom.  The fear was evident in the mother’s face and you could see the thoughts in her head racing through.  The little girl was quickly moved aside and the mother went from the hallway outside the bathroom to standing next to the tub in a fraction of a second. 
 
Now with all the squealing coming from the little boy you would have thought there was blood everywhere or there were missing limbs.  Instantly the little boy realized mother was standing there and he looked up with all the alligator tears on his cheeks and started freaking out.  He kept repeating over and over again,
 
“I swear mommy I didn’t do it!  I swear I did not put anything in my mouth I don’t know how they got into my body!  I promise I did not do it! WWAAAAHHHH!!!”
 
The mother for the life of her could not figure out what was going on and finally got the boy to calm down enough he could tell her what was going on.  Now when I tell you what he said just close your eyes and try to image all of this in your head.  Are you ready?  OK here it is straight out of the boy’s mouth while he is looking straight down the whole time.
 
“Mommy I swear I do not know how the marbles got in my body.  I am a big boy, I don’t put things in my mouth anymore and I don’t remember swallowing my marbles.  So I don’t know how they got there!”
 
The mother perched on her knees next to the tub staring at the little boy still not quite comprehending what he was telling her asked him if he can feel the marbles and can he point to where they are at. 
 
The little boy took a deep breath, calmly looked at his mother and point to his……… “area”.  Instantly it dawned on the mother he found his “beans” and being a toddler thought that he swallowed some marbles and they got stuck there.

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Well, Todays lesson is depilation. Why, I really dont know what it has to do with vintage retro erotica although through the ages it has been popular to photograph. Here is the meaning:

Depilation means hair removal. Strictly, "pilus" is Latin for hair and putting the "de" in front of it, in medical terminology, means to deprive or be rid of. Putting "ation" at the end of the word, in English, makes it into an action.

Why would we want to remove hair?

Many cultures in the world have different attitudes to hair.

Most cultures not only tolerate hair on the head, but make it into a feature. Different haircuts, styles and colours are used to attract members of the opposite sex and denote social status and wealth. In some cultures, or in some societies, haircuts can also show allegiance to different sects, groups or gangs.

Attitudes to body hair and vary between the sexes, different cultures and personal taste. In many western cultures, females remove hair from all areas of the body and face with the exception of the scalp, eyebrows and usually pubic hair-although this is often shaped or reduced. Attitudes to under-arm hair (axillary hair) are very variable with some cultures tolerating it and others abhoring it.

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